Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby Junketh71 » Mon Sep 30, 2019 4:24 pm

Well, this totally rocked. Thanks for updating!
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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby Matt L. » Tue Oct 01, 2019 9:13 am

Well written chapter, very intriguing. My curiosity is boiling over on how Tanya's going to handle the changes to her figure and if the results are going to alter her lifestyle and self-esteem. A very fun read to be sure.

Cheers, Matt
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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby div » Wed Oct 02, 2019 7:58 am

Hello Kid A!

The scenario is not exactly new except for a few twists. I remember at least two examples which were delivered in style.

Your female protagonist does not seem to suffer badly from stupidity and her character seems quite centered on her looks. Can't realy see how to make it work. Removing the mirrors won't do the trick.

Kind Regards!
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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby kid a » Wed Oct 02, 2019 8:55 am

div wrote:Hello Kid A!

The scenario is not exactly new except for a few twists. I remember at least two examples which were delivered in style.

Your female protagonist does not seem to suffer badly from stupidity and her character seems quite centered on her looks. Can't realy see how to make it work. Removing the mirrors won't do the trick.

Kind Regards!


Not really sure what you’re getting at or how to respond to this but I’ll try

I acknowledged above that it’s been done before. And considering I’m only getting started (and you have no idea what I have planned), your judgment here is beyond premature.
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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby div » Wed Oct 02, 2019 10:12 am

Hello Kid A!

Could well be that you are right.

A bit of a tunnel vision is the least famous of my errors. There are lot more. On the other hand I have got some well developed blood hound qualities which are useful for sniffing out the cracks early on. Not that it would help avoiding a single one of them. Tunnel vision! Remember?

Don't let yourself get distracted by me. I am well prepared to be taught a lesson.

Kind Regards!
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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby kid a » Wed Oct 02, 2019 10:49 am

lol...

Look i welcome constructive feedback (probably better via DM) but was just confused about your point. Not suggesting (nor have I ever) that I’m some brilliant author, but selfishly I would propose that my stories and my plots have generally “worked”.

So maybe just give me the benefit of the doubt at this stage? I have a long way to go here. More this week.
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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby blurmy » Wed Oct 02, 2019 3:53 pm

Well, I for one can't wait to see where you take this interesting and well written start.
You're one of the authors that I always like to check on and never disappoint.
Keep up the great work x
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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby tfrmer » Wed Oct 02, 2019 4:50 pm

div wrote:Hello Kid A!

The scenario is not exactly new except for a few twists. I remember at least two examples which were delivered in style.

Your female protagonist does not seem to suffer badly from stupidity and her character seems quite centered on her looks. Can't realy see how to make it work. Removing the mirrors won't do the trick.

Kind Regards!


She went through a traumatic event, might be too trusting of the people who are protecting her life and why wouldn't she as she's clearly attracted to the agent that is setting this up. Lots of people get fat, especially when they have to start a new schedule, job or after moving somewhere new as it can be easy to break those good, healthy habits when your environment changes dramatically and I should know having been rather fit. There are some additional manipulations at work as well and everyone can be in denial, especially as she may not notice the weight gain becoming excessive, but I think it would be a fair assessment of her behavior to not realize how much she's gained after all how often have women asked "Does this make my butt look big" as they don't seem to trust their own eyes.

I think Kid's doing a really good job with this so far, is a very well respected writer and if you don't like the story then don't comment as you spent $0 to read his story as even that Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons who does nothing, but critique and over-analyze stuff at least pays for his content first.
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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby kid a » Thu Oct 03, 2019 3:38 am

blurmy wrote:Well, I for one can't wait to see where you take this interesting and well written start.
You're one of the authors that I always like to check on and never disappoint.
Keep up the great work x


High praise coming from you. Thanks. :)
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Re: Witness Protection - By Kid A (XWG)

Postby kid a » Thu Oct 03, 2019 3:42 am

tfrmer wrote:
I think Kid's doing a really good job with this so far, is a very well respected writer and if you don't like the story then don't comment as you spent $0 to read his story as even that Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons who does nothing, but critique and over-analyze stuff at least pays for his content first.


ty for this.

To be fair, I am fine with criticism (see above) as long as it’s logical. I’m certainly not ripping anyone off (can someone point me to a plot just like this? Will be a gigantic coincidence if so because I rarely read other stories these days) and again just getting started.

If someone wants to poke holes when I’m finished, so be it.

Anyways hopefully enough of this - will be working on the next part today.
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