Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby Lyssa » Thu Jul 26, 2018 5:19 pm

Oh how you set up Paige to fail! :D That was a great ending to a great story. I never expected Paige to be able to complete the jumping jacks, falling on her ass that way, :lol: The whining too, :lol: Too bad Kelly's continued weight loss wasn't covered or getting in a few jabs at her nemesis. Wouldn't it be cool if Kelly bumps into Paige at a morning weigh in or something, and not recognizing her until reading off the names, what a shock it would be.

Thank you for sharing such a great story! :D

:D
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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby Matt L. » Thu Jul 26, 2018 6:39 pm

Let me begin by stating Darla’s especially sarcastic comment, “Looking good Paige”, captures the fundamental enjoyment in the weight gain revenge genre.

Camp Cupcake’s star counselor reduced to an obese camper, 400-pounds of blubber, and as I mentioned before, the unfashionable eyeglasses are a nice touch. You have subtly indicated Paige’s personality developing an acute docile nature which brilliantly corresponds with her portly appearance. Door frame wide hips, comically large underwear, Paige hasn’t become just a porker, she’s a big hog!

I didn’t expect the twist at the end, the Camp Cupcake experiment, the mascot comment very cute.
Earlier I commented how your story has a cool vintage EC horror comic ambiance, and your conclusion rates as fitting and creative,


Your dialogue and descriptions are the finest example of not only the genre but damn good writing all together. You have certainly excelled with this one.

Especially loved the Darla pushing and plodding the cartoonishly fat captive line!

Cheers, Matt
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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby kid a » Thu Jul 26, 2018 7:41 pm

Thanks everyone. Hard to believe, but today was 100 days on the dot of writing this one. Tried to stay focused and all of your feedback and enthusiasm for the tale undoubtedly kept me going.

I’m still planning on an eplilogue, so if you feel that something you wanted wasn’t covered..feel free to PM me. Not going to promise anything, and I can’t please all, but I’ll certainly do my best.
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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby kid a » Tue Jul 31, 2018 8:30 am

EPILOGUE

Two summers later, none other than Miss Kelly Smith made a triumphant return to Camp Cupcake in a starring role as their newest Junior Counselor. Going back through the record books, none of the camp employees could recall a former camper making making such a remarkable turnaround. But driven by her awful experience, Covington’s encouragement and a healthy dose of newfound determination, Kelly had succeeding in a complete transformation of her body and identity.

Down to a sleek 140 pounds, it was hard to believe she had ever had a weight problem; let alone an extra 200 pounds to lug around. On a crisp June evening, she strolled across the camp at dusk taking in the sights and sounds. It was a surreal experience being on the flip side of this coin; she uttered a few words of encouragement to passing campers and received warm smiles in return from the chubby youngsters.

She had one goal in mind; to change the tone at Camp Cupcake and make a difference in as many young lives as possible. Granted, Covington was still in charge (and no less an iron fist over the facilities), but the two of them had formed a bond of sorts and Kelly felt empowered to makes a few changes to the culture where she could.

But as she looked at her task list for the evening, she realized that certain things never had and never would be changing around these parts. Kelly approached the Contraband Storage facility, feeling nervous energy and a bit of trepidation. She had heard rumblings and rumors from the other staff about what resided within these walls, but no confirmation to this point. Looking up at the front of the building, memories of her times in Cabin 12 flashed through her mind.

The ornate steel numbers that marked the location remained affixed above the entrance, but years of neglect and the elements had left them rusted and in need of replacement. The number two hung slanted on its nail, seemingly by a thread. Hesitating for a moment, she retrieved the key that Covington had provided from her pocket; she felt the clicks vibrate up her slender wrist as she gently inserted it into the lock and opened the door.

The first thing that struck her was the smell. She had not visited a county fair in some time (too many diet-related temptations) but once upon a time it had been a regular summer diversion. The scents of baked goods and fried food filled the air. Her stomach growled for a moment in response but she quickly caught herself as she walked into the main hall of the building.

The structure was very similar to that of her days as a camper, with one huge difference. All of the bunks had been removed. Huge grey storage lockers rested against the wall in the place of each bed. She saw they were labeled for the various categories of confiscated food. Chocolate, soft drinks, fried foods (marked “DO NOT KEEP OVERNIGHT”) and so on.

She chuckled to herself for a moment when a commotion from the end of the hall caught her eye. She watched as a heavy-set, young brunette ran (lumbered...) into the old counselor living quarters, screaming a litany of accusations towards an unseen counterparty.

“Ha!!! You fat cow!!!”, the girl screamed triumphantly. “I knew you were out here on your scooter again!! A little after-dinner snack, eh? Well let’s see what was on the menu...I’m a bit hungry myself.”

“No!!! Those are mine!!!”, came a muffled reply.

Puzzled, Kelly walked towards the door. Noting that Paige’s old bikini poster was still affixed to the wall, she stifled a laugh as she entered the room and attempted to convey an air of authority towards what was obviously a camper intrusion into the facility. She noticed that the old, wooden door had been replaced by a set of large, swinging metal panels. The entry way to the quarters was now triple in size and she passed through with ease.

“CAMPER!!!”, she yelled towards the fat girl with the dark hair. “What do you think you are doing in here....oh my god....”

Kelly’s mind reeled as she attempted to process the situation. At the end of the room, an huge bed lay before her. Huge, until it was contrasted against the gargantuan blond who was clearly its sole and permanent resident. A sign had been posted on the wall above - in cartoonish, pink font it simply read “PORKY PAIGE”.

The fattest human that Kelly had ever laid eyes upon, the poor girl was easily north of 600 pounds, and took up the entire queen sized mattress - nearly pouring over the sides. She sat there, frantically stuffing the last of a plate of cookies into her waiting mouth while her portly attendant tried in vain to grab them away. Her upper arms rippled and swayed uncontrollably from the effort, drooping onto her enormous belly and flapping into her huge and partially exposed, sagging breasts.

She was dressed in a gigantic muumuu which only served to accentuate every roll and fold on her gigantic body. Her ass and thighs formed a virtual cushion of fat, propping her up a couple of feet towards the ceiling and surging out in a pool of oozing blubber to her sides. Her massive thighs were nearly covered by her billowing belly rolls, with meaty calves peaking through and culminating in plump, comically dainty feet compared to the rest of her form.

Her bloated, fat face rested atop her corpulent body like the star on an oversized Christmas tree. Multiple sagging chins jiggled as she finished her treat while whining simultaneously.

“Don’t take my cookies!!! I’m so hungry,” she sobbed. Kelly watched as the porky brunette sneered and made a show of shoving the last 3 into her own mouth at once. The huge blond watched her gorging from the corner of her eye, and pausing her blubbering production for a moment, seemed to smirk to herself as the treats went down her captor’s hatch.

“Tough shit, Paige,” the girl announced before swiveling her huge hips around and heading for the door. “That’ll teach you to eat my....I mean the camp’s food without permission.”

Almost running into Kelly, she froze in her tracks and dropped a entire carton of Oreos onto the floor. Kelly stared at her wide-eyed. Estimating her weight at around 300 pounds, she noted that the girl was wearing the infamous “Shirt of Shame”. Her voluminous belly rolls had the lower portions of the fabric stretched to their limits; up above however the garment seemed to have been given a reprieve.

Keeping with the theme of the cruelest, universal punishment inflicted on a certain segment of fat girls in the population, her tiny yet flabby breasts had not exactly matched the growth of the rest of her body. She peered at Kelly through the thick-lensed glasses that rested atop her wide, pudgy nose. As she adjusted them with a chubby and dimpled hand, Kelly watched her meaty upper arms wobble like jello.

The name tag on her shirt read “DARLA”. Realization struck Kelly as the plus sized, nerdish girl began to speak with a frightened tone in her voice.

“Hi...i mean...I’m sorry for the mess, Counselor. PAIGE over here was sneaking food again and I uh....”

Shifting her bulky hips and ass uncomfortably, she tried to wipe a patch of incriminating frosting from her doughy face as she continued. “I swear it won’t happen again. Ms Covington told me that I had to do a better job of managing the Contraband Facility or I was going to be in even more trouble.”

Darla pouted as she tugged at her Porky Pig themed shirt. A hopeful smile spread across her face for a moment as she looked up at Kelly. “Did she ask about me?”

Snorting nervously, she continued. “She never replies to my emails anymore and...”

Kelly looked at her with a twinge of pity as she cut her off mid-sentence. “No, Darla, she didn’t even tell me you worked in here now. I mean....what happened to....how long have you been in here??”

Looking back down in disappointment, Darla responded. “About two years now. She promised me that if I did a good job she would get my scholarship at school reinstated but I keep screwing up I guess.”

She scowled and scratched her tubby belly mindlessly. “NO THANKS TO THIS FAT SOW OVER HERE!!!”

Paige had drifted off into a brief food-induced nap, and woke with a start. “Huh...what?? You liar!!!” she screamed, her entire body undulating from the exertion.

“You’re the one who keeps taking my food and...”

Chuckling, Kelly interrupted. “Now now girls....it looks like there’s plenty of snacks to go around for both of you.”

She eyed Darla’s now bloated body in awe. “Besides; I get the impression that Covington is very pleased with the...um...progress that the two of you are making in here.”

Darla pursed her plump lips in protest. “Then why did she send you to see us?”, she whined.

“Something about checking if there was room for another queen-sized bed over there,” Kelly replied, pointing to the end of the room opposite Paige’s spot.

Darla gulped, looking at Kelly in a mixture of disbelief and fear.

“Well I have to say, it was FANTASTIC catching up with both of you. Looking great sweeties!!”

“But I gotta run,” she finished, rolling her eyes as she pivoted her lithe form, leaving them to continue the bickering.

She heard plates crashing to the floor and fat insults flying as she walked back out into the refreshing evening air, slamming the door firmly behind her.

“Good lord,” Kelly said to no one in particular. “Remind me never to get on Covington’s bad side.”
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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby riptoryx » Tue Jul 31, 2018 6:43 pm

Reversals can be such perverse fun! :twisted:

Thanks for all your work to bring this story to fruition.
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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby kid a » Tue Jul 31, 2018 6:52 pm

riptoryx wrote:Reversals can be such perverse fun! :twisted:

Thanks for all your work to bring this story to fruition.


Thanks very much. Not gonna lie...this was a workout. But so worth it.

Like much of what i write, the pivotal moments of the epilogue didn’t come to me until I started to type. Very happy with this finished product; hopefully you all enjoyed the ride.
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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby Matt L. » Tue Jul 31, 2018 9:38 pm

Hey,

That was a sensational twist you pulled! I was expecting a much more traditional epilogue but you've managed to once again to color outside the lines. The Porky Paige sign was very clever, what a neat spin on the moniker, I didn't see it coming. Darla in the shirt of shame and barely fitting in it, classic! Likewise, Darla abandoned by Mrs. Covington and doomed to obesity, the extra bed to be sent to the storage facility, brilliant!

Fat Camp is a masterpiece of the genre, genuinely entertaining.

Cheers, Matt
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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby kid a » Wed Aug 01, 2018 3:26 am

Matt L. wrote:Hey,

That was a sensational twist you pulled! I was expecting a much more traditional epilogue but you've managed to once again to color outside the lines. The Porky Paige sign was very clever, what a neat spin on the moniker, I didn't see it coming. Darla in the shirt of shame and barely fitting in it, classic! Likewise, Darla abandoned by Mrs. Covington and doomed to obesity, the extra bed to be sent to the storage facility, brilliant!

Fat Camp is a masterpiece of the genre, genuinely entertaining.

Cheers, Matt


Thanks Matt. Now I’m gonna go through, give it one last edit, fix the duplicate chapter sequencing (*rolls eyes*) and start plotting a sequel to Bed Ridden.
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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby Lyssa » Wed Aug 01, 2018 4:13 pm

Dude! Totally weird but cool! Darla's my favorite character but making her fat and wimpy, and you can tell she sees Kelly as her superior, and wearing the shirt of shame! :o delicious! I guess Porky Paige is the perfect nickname that she is as big as a house! :lol:

I totally love this story!

:D
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Re: Fat Camp - by Kid A (XWG, Revenge)

Postby Junketh71 » Wed Aug 01, 2018 5:08 pm

Well, this was a situation that I didn't see coming. Thanks for sharing the epilogue with us.
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