A TG Questionnaire, by brucejedi (tg, wg)

[brucejedi]

Gender Studies Assignment: A TG Questionnaire
by brucejedi

Kudos to 1sm3ghzn for introducing me to this genre.
-bj

Question 1: If you were a girl…would your handwriting be nice?

I reread the directions. “Picture an average girl your age. Not a supermodel. Not a sex symbol. Just a regular girl who might be in one of your classes.”

Well, most of the girls I know have pretty neat handwriting. At least neater than mine is.

“It would be fairly neat,” I write. Then as a joke I add, “And I’d dot my ‘i’s with little hearts.”

Question 2: If you were a girl…would you like pink?

I shut my eyes, trying to imagine the sorts of things a girl my age might like. This is such a stupid assignment. I still can’t believe the guidance office put this Gender Studies class in my schedule.

“Sure,” I write in big, straight letters. “Why not?”

Most girls like pink, right?

Question 3: If you were a girl…would your hair be straight or curly?

“Curly, I guess. But not TOO curly. I want it to be easy to comb.”

I’m not sure why I put that last part, but it seemed sensible. My sister takes forever to get ready in the morning and it’s super annoying.

Question 4: If you were a girl…what would be your favorite color?

I have no idea. I just write the first color that comes to mind.

“Pink.” Without even realizing it, I dot the “i” with a heart.

Question 5: If you were a girl…what color would your hair be?

Pink. No, I can’t put that. I brush my hand through my long, curly hair.

“Red.” I write. “A nice auburn-red that brings out my eyes.”

Question 6: If you were a girl…what color would your eyes be?

Pink. Just kidding. “Blue,” I write. “Bright, sparkling blue.”

The girl I’m picturing is actually kind of pretty.

Question 7: If you were a girl…would you like makeup?

Makeup. Why do girls have to wear it and boys don’t? It seems unfair. I look up from my paper to the mirror above my desk. The face staring back is quite beautiful, her eyes especially.

But something is missing.

“Truth be told,” I write, “I’d probably feel naked without makeup on.”

Question 8: If you were a girl…would you be sporty?

This is a tough one. I want to write “yes,” but something holds me back. Sweating causes your eyeliner to run, and that can hurt if it gets in your eyes. Plus it means having to wash your hair more often, which dries it out and turns the curls to frizz.

I think some more. There’s a line of exercise clothes that feature the words “Love Pink” in block lettering, but they never struck me as intended for actual exercise. More for pretending to be sporty or for hanging around boys who are sporty, but without actually being sporty yourself.

I suppose it’s harder for girls to be athletic. There’s no expectation that you will be, like there is for boys. Plus, on average girls don’t have as much natural ability, and that could be discouraging.

So that settles it. “I don’t think I’d be all that sporty,” I write.

Question 9: If you were a girl…would you wear high heels?

I glance down at my legs. Squished against the chair, my thighs look depressingly thick.

I sigh, thinking back to when I could hold my own against the boys in gym class. But then they started growing taller and their shoulders broadened. Meanwhile, my shoulders stayed about the same. What broadened for me was my hips.

Over time it grew more and more obvious that I lacked the speed and coordination that even a lot of the girls possess. When we jog I’m out of breath after the second lap. So I guess I don’t get as much exercise as I should, which explains the lack of tone in my thighs.

That brings me back to the question at hand. If your legs aren’t exactly model quality, high heels are the best thing to spruce them up.

“I’d wear them all the time,” I write, “if they didn’t hurt my feet.”

Question 10: If you were a girl…would you wear a skirt?

I glance back down at the soft flesh that coats my hips. I’d take up aerobics or something, but after a day in heels that’s the last thing on my mind. Flats would be easier on my feet, but I hate feeling shorter than everyone.

To be sure, I’m not sure how a skirt would look on me at the present time. If it’s too short, or too tight, you feel self-conscious. I suppose with the right shoes, I could pull it off.

“I’d wear a skirt,” I write, “so long as it didn’t make my butt look fat.”

Question 11: If you were a girl…would you wear jewelry?

I blink a couple times. This was a bugger of an assignment. How many more questions were there anyway?

“Yes,” I write, without thinking much of it.

It seemed sensible enough. A cute necklace can draw the eye off other things, like that tummy roll that won’t disappear.

Question 12: If you were a girl…what size would your breasts be?

Well these are getting rather personal now, aren’t they?

I wiggle the pencil between my fingers. Most girls would be happy at a B-cup—enough to fill out a top without being too big a distraction. But puberty hits some girls harder than others, I suppose. And it’s no secret that when a girl gains weight, some of it lands on her chest.

You can’t make up answers on an assignment like this one—you might as well tell it like it is. “Probably a 34D,” I write. “A B- or a C-cup would be nice, but a D is more realistic.”

Question 13: If you were a girl…would you be into guys?

I stand up and pace around the room, stopping at the full length mirror. I may not have a model’s figure, but my curves would attract boys’ attention. A sparkly necklace dangles between my breasts, advertising my cleavage. I close my eyes and picture the type of attention my curves might bring…

“If a boy appreciated what I have to offer,” I write, “I could be into him.”

Question 14: If you were a girl…would you use pads or tampons?

Ugh, not the topic I wanted to focus on.

“If I were on my period,” I scribble, “I’d be wearing a tampon.”

Question 15: If you were a girl…what type of shirt would you be wearing right now?

This was an easy one. I just describe the top I’m actually wearing at the moment. Pink, scoop-neck, cinched at the waist to show off my chest.

Question 16: If you would were a girl…would you be wearing briefs, bikini, thong, or boxers?

I cross out boxers immediately. Those would never work at that time of the month.

Briefs—do any girls wear them? The word makes it seem like they’d have a fly or something. My hand glides against my smooth crotch. What use would a fly have? For a girl, none that I can think of.

By contrast, bikinis were tailor designed for the female anatomy. With nothing to support, the fabric can be soft and delicate. Plus, girls have hips—some more so than others—and bikinis are shaped to accommodate that.

I consider the final option. Thongs have their uses but tend to ride up your butt, especially when you’ve got a little extra back there.

I put my pencil to the paper. “Possibly a thong, but more likely I’d be wearing a bikini.”

That’s what I’m currently wearing, anyhow.

Question 17: If you were a girl…what would be your intelligence? One being stupid and ten being high enough to drive the class nerd up the wall.

Well we already read in this class that boys and girls are equal in intelligence, so there’s not much I can say here. I guess I’m about average in most aspects of my life. I’m not fat but I’m not exactly skinny either. I’m not a supermodel but I’m certainly not ugly. I’m not a brainiac but I’m not an idiot, at least not about most topics.

I write down a six.

Question 18: If you were a girl…what type of bra would you be wearing?

Hmm. As a D-cup you need a little extra lift to keep everything looking perky, so underwire and shaping are a must. Body by Victoria is a great option—very functional without sacrificing the sexiness factor.

My bra is visible from my angle, so I’m reminded that that’s the style I’m wearing right now, in fact. There are no “ifs” about it.

Question 19: If you were a girl…how old would you be, how tall would you be without shoes and what would you weigh without clothes? (Don't lie)

I wince at this question, thinking back to the abandoned diets and exercise programs, the vows to eat healthier and stay away from chocolate. I tilt my head down, my curly red hair sliding off my slender shoulders. I stare at my thighs squishing out to either side, at my tummy pooching out over my underwear. I’d love to be 120 pounds. Heck I’d love to be 130 pounds. My recent slide into the 140’s is embarrassing to think about. Dresses that used to fit now form creases at the hips and rear.

Being short doesn’t help either. When you’re 5’3” every pound shows—and to think I’m only seventeen! They say as you get older, it’s even harder to keep the weight off. I shudder at the thought.

Question 20: If you were a girl…what would your name be?

My name is Erica. I’m just your average girl who likes cute underwear and cute boys, who would love to lose 15 pounds but hates exercising, who wishes her boobs were lighter, who can only imagine what it might be like not to be female—and not to have to deal with crap like tampons and sports bras and cat calls and underwire.

I slip on my heels and smooth out my skirt. I hope I do okay on this assignment, I whisper, as I saunter off to class.

[Junketh71]

This was an impressive and thorough TG TF story. Thanks for posting it here!