IDENTITY ADJUSTMENT BY MATT L.
The Randolph Institute for Women; established in 1930 and located on the outskirts of Los Angeles, a hospital catering to behavioral and mental disorders, predominantly impoverished females and the economically challenged.
Madison Warner was a dazzling example of a psychiatric nurse and equally of feminine beauty.
Madison’s brown hair was naturally wavy, dusting her shoulders, framing her gorgeous features while her hourglass figure was neat and trim.
24-years of age and she had recently graduated with honors from a notable university, keen on making a name for herself in the field, albeit rubbing some of her colleagues the wrong way with her enthusiasm and ego. Often times debating the senior old school psychotherapists and lauding her credentials in behavioral development and diseases of the mind. The latest clash of wills was between Madison and Dr. Hugo Evans concerning his cognitive lobotomy hypothesis against much more universal therapy. This incident eventually reach the administrative director, Leah Commons, and Madison was called to her office to square things over.
Leah was an astute woman well into her fifties, gray hair in a short pedestrian style, horn rimmed glasses, and borderline pudgy. Notorious in her austere nature to staff and patients alike.
“Take a seat please”, Leah said in a piqued tone.
Madison did as she told, anxious to get the meeting over with as quick as possible.
Leah engaged in a sip of water, subsequently folding her hands over desk, clearing her throat before raking Madison over the coals.
“I have no doubt that you’re an incomparable asset to our facility, your academic reputation speaks for itself but challenging one of our finest psychotherapist is where I draw the line. Your behavior toward Dr. Evans is inexcusable.”
Madison blurted a mumble which caused Leah to snip, “Something you wish to say? Out with it Nurse Warner…”
Madison didn’t hold back, “Dr. Evans resembles a butcher not a mental health professional, and his techniques are questionable if not thoroughly inane.”
Leah eased back in her leather chair, “I think the issue isn’t Dr. Evans at all, it’s your ego.”
Madison tilted her head, “I beg your pardon.”
“Oh really, Nurse Warner, even a few of your colleagues have describe you as being haughty, pompous is perhaps a better term.”
Madison held back her temper yet she was raging inside, “I take pride in my work, I’m committed to my profession, if I do criticize my co-workers, which is rare, it’s with the best intentions.”
“Like I said, I’m aware of your qualifications and intelligence but remember you’re a registered nurse and not a psychologist”, Leah huffily replied, “Your enthusiastic attitude notwithstanding, lingers on the threshold of bad manners.”
“I’m not bad-mannered”, Madison quibbled.”
Leah patronizingly grinned, “You’re a bull-headed young woman, Madison. Watch it; it could lead you down a route you won’t like.”
Madison answered back with a similar condescending warble, “Yes, Dr. Commons, I’ll be a good nurse, whatever the doctor says. May I be excused now, I have patients to see.”
Leah leaned in toward Madison, “Yes, by all means, I’ve enough of you, you may be excused.”
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Madison stopped off at the nurse’s station to look over her schedule, Cindy Walker RN greeted her with a candy smile, “Did Leah set you straight or what?”
Cindy was a cute blonde, approximately Madison’s age, rather chubby, she was much more of a modest caliber and less spunky than the self-assured Madison.
“That old hag is out of touch with reality”, Madison acidly replied.
Cindy wagged her head, about to reach for a donut when she caught an unpleasant grimace from Madison.
“What?” Cindy said with a perplexed smirk.
Madison stood with a hand over her waist, “The box is half empty, how many donuts have you had? You sure you want another? You’re already pushing 200-pounds.”
Cindy’s mouth dropped, “I’m not that heavy, and since when are you the food police?”
“Don’t you have any pride in your appearance?” Madison carped.
Cindy flashed Madison a perturb shot from her eyes, “I think I’ve enough of your bossiness, bad enough you’re a show off but mind your own business.”
Madison lightly chuckled, “Okay, whatever you say but in a couple of years when you’re extra tubby don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Cindy grabbed the donut, sarcastically answering, “Pardon me if I’m not as vain as you, Maddie.
“Naturally somebody like you would call me vain”, Madison syrupy smiled.
“Why? Because I’m somewhat plump and didn’t graduate from an Ivy League school?” Cindy bitingly scoffed at Madison.
“Doughy big hip girls who lack professionalism and barely have any kind of an IQ to make it through a second rate nursing school usually end up working for women like me”, Madison rattled off, “To be honest I’m surprised you’re not some truck stop waitress, that pedigree is written all over you.”
Cindy stood up and took a defensive stance, “Oh, Maddie, girl! I see how you weigh yourself 10 times a day and how you work out everyday after work. I know my stuff, I’m not the stupid twit you think of me.”
“Exactly what are you implying?” Madison sneered.
Cindy took a big bite out of the donut, “You have a fat phobia. What’s wrong, Madison? You afraid people won’t take you seriously with a fat ass and chunky thighs?”
“Jealous?” Madison icily grinned.
Cindy sighed, “Someday you’ll pay for your arrogance, I only hope I’m around to see it.”
Madison cheekily smiled, “Of course, silly girls always believe their superiors are arrogant!”
And with that Madison grabbed a patient’s chart - Sandra Ford - and strutted away from the nurse’s station.
Cindy spitefully remarked in her thoughts while nibbling on the donut, “If you were really superior you’d know that uppity girls always get what they deserve…”
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Madison reviewed Sandra’s chart while standing outside the door to her room.
Sandra P. Ford
Age - 21
Diagnosis: Bond - McLaglen - Disorder.
Chronic immaturity coupled with low self-esteem - inferiority complex
Treatment - Cognitive therapy - specific meds - Durlihol 100.
Madison gently knocked on the door before entering, “Good afternoon, Sandy, I’m here to take your vitals and see how you’re doing.”
Sandra’s room was the basic hospital room, small uninviting, almost cold.
Several stuff animals placed around the room, posters of teenage pop bands and boy singers decorating the walls.
Sandra was sprawled over the bed with coloring books, a hefty young maiden, all of 239-pounds.
Sandra’s puffy features were unanimously mousy, black glasses over her bulbous nose, her black hair in pigtails. Instead of the generic hospital gown, Sandra was wearing a black T-shirt with a the caption in pink lettering - GIRL POWER, and black pajama bottoms decorated with Warner Brother’s cartoon characters.
Madison had a warm relationship with Sandra, and treated her better than average.
“I’m going to take your blood pressure and temperature, okay, Sandy”, Madison said as she surveyed her room.
Plenty of snack food abound, and with that all sorts of candy wrappers and empty containers spewed about the room.
“We’re going to have to get housekeeping up here as soon as possible, such a mess”, Madison said but in a sweet tone.
Sandra paused from her coloring to let Madison place the blood pressure cup over her arm, a docile smile over her face, “I love it when you come visit, Maddie; you’re my best favorite nurse.”
Madison adjusted the blood pressure cup over Sandy’s thick upper arm, politely advising her charge, “Well, you’re my most favorite patient but you should really take it easy with the sweets.”
Upon Sandy questioning Madison, the quick witted nurse was up front but calmly explained, “The medication you’re on has nasty side effects, it promotes weight gain, and can alter your metabolism. You have enough on your plate as it is than to have to deal with obesity.”
“Um, I guess, when’s lunch?” Sandra smiled.
Madison constructively construed in her thoughts, “I’m going to have to speak with food service and put you on a healthy diet, see about getting your medication reduced as well or else you’re going to turn into a blimp.”
Madison went about her business with the routine exam, Sandra excitedly talking a mile a minute about various items she thought would interest her nurse.
Video games - cartoons - teenage romance novels.
Finally the exam finished, Sandra holding up her coloring book, “See, Madison, I color good now, inside the lines and everything!”
“Well done!” Madison chirped, then pulled up a chair next to the bed where Sandra reclined.
In a firm tone but with a sugary smile, Madison conveyed, “Honey, I’m telling you this out of friendship but we have to get you out and into the recreation center to mingle with the other patients. I know you feel uncomfortable but its not healthy being cooped up all alone. We have to work on your anti-social behavior.”
Sandra pouted, “Do I have too?”
Madison nodded, her tone affectionate, “You’ll be okay, you’ll be around lots of girls with behavioral problems, you can support each other through friendship.”
“Are you my friend, Madison?” Sandra’s voice cracking.
“Of course I’m your friend”, Madison’s eyes sparkling with her brilliant smile, “I want to help you, okay? I want to help you leave this hospital and begin a nice life and be a positive member of the community. Now I understand you never finished high school, so we need to remedy that, there are programs to help you earn a diploma. Is that cool or what?”
Sandra pushed back her glasses, nervously gushing, “Well, I ain’t never really been book smart, school bores me.”
Madison bestowed Sandra a reflective glance, “Maybe we need to concentrate on improving your mental health first and we’ll worry about school later.”
Madison added a few notes to Sandra’s chart and promptly stood up from her chair, “I have to check on a few more patients but is there anything I can do for you or get you?”
“A few king size Snickers bars!” Sandra peeped.
“This evening after dinner I’ll make a stop at the vending machine and get you one, just one”, Madison replied.
“I guess, thanks, Madison, I wish you didn’t have to go so soon, I like your company”, Sandra smiled.
“Same here”, Madison said while taking another glance at Sandra’s room, her eyes focusing on the stuffed animals. “However, my duties include a few more patients, though maybe sometime in the future we can spend a little extra time together.”
“Cool!” Sandra applauded loudly.
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Later that evening once Madison’s shift was over and she was off duty, she made tracks to the employee work out center located in a building adjacent to the hospital.
Slipping out of her nurse’s uniform, Madison garbed herself in a sporty black T-shirt and teal yoga pants. Momentarily studying her reflection in the large mirror covering the entire wall.
Rotating at her hips, she felt confident about her figure, her form nearly flawless with exception to a minor tummy pouch which she patted a couple times. Boarding the scale at a swift pace, Madison frowned at the fact she hadn’t yet met her goal weight of 121-pounds.
“Four more pounds to go”, Madison contemplated while making a leisurely stroll over to the treadmill.
Madison revved up the pace, energetically walking, thinking about the string bikini which would be her reward once conquering her goal.
Madison was unaware at first but a stocky man with thinning grayish-brown hair had joined her in the employee work out center. The lab coat he was wearing was foul with stains, a cigarette lingering from his lips, five o’clock shadow heavy on his ugly face.
Finally he stood in front of Madison who spewed razor sharp eyes at him, “Dr. Evans, I always thought you’d be stalker.”
Dr. Evans removed the cigarette from his thin lips, his voice sounding peculiarly close to Lee Marvin. “I’ve been meaning to talk with you ever since you stormed out after our debate. Things are still unsettled as they say.”
“Well buzz off”, Madison sneered, “This is my personal time, I’m off duty.”
Dr. Evans returned the square to his lips, placing his hands in his pockets, fronting a relaxed mode, “I know, Madison, such conversations are better served in my office, better yet, my lab. There you can see my experiments first hand.”
Madison grumbled, “I have a good mind to report you to the psychiatric board for lack of ethics and putting patients in harm.”
“A good mind?” Dr. Evan’s smile resembling a snarl, “Do you have a good mind, a healthy mind? A mind that isn’t rotten with obsessive or precarious behavior?”
Madison knew Dr. Evans was eccentric but his questions scared her a little, “If you really want to hold a conversation with me, I suggest we have a conference with Leah in attendance.”
“That’s odd”, Dr. Evans replied, “You loathe Leah almost as much as you loathe me.”
Madison slowed the treadmill, “This conversation is through, I’m out of here.”
“Never mind about your mind, for now”, Dr. Evans took a step toward Madison as she stepped off the treadmill, his grin somehow distorting his already creepy features, “Your body is what interest’s me.”
Madison scowled in fear, “I’m going to call security!”
Dr. Evans assured Madison in a blithe tone and slight chuckle, “Oh please don’t flatter yourself, I have no desire to put any moves on you but I will advise you to be nicer to me. One day I might be your psychotherapist!”
“You’re a madman!” Madison blurted, “Why would I ever need a psychiatrist?”
Dr. Evans removed his hands from the lab coat pockets and began straightening his tie, “You have a phobia, an obsession likewise, understandable but very off kilter.”
“You’re full of shit!” Madison angrily glared at Dr. Evans.
Dr. Evans slickly smiled, “I fear you’re in the chaos of denial, piggy.”
Madison stood frozen in her spot, her eyes burning in rage.
Dr. Evans took a drag from his smoke, “Isn’t that what they called you in school? Piggy. Of course mommy and daddy sent you off to fat camp when you were 13 because of the ridicule you experienced, or maybe they were ashamed about having a fat daughter.”
Madison took a step back, “How did you…”
“Oh I did some snooping around, investigations are much easier now in this internet age”, Dr. Evans comically stated. “You kept most of the weight off, excluding a period time the summer after high school graduation, you entered your inaugural college semester kind of beefy. Remind me, dear, how much did you exactly weigh before starting to use appetite suppressors and frantically working out.”
Madison wagged her head in disbelief, too shocked to provide an answer.
“175-pounds? Something like that, very close to a porky 180-pounds”, Dr. Evans stated the fact.
“You’re still working out, and keeping your appetite in check with those suppressors. Very nice otherwise you’d be a literal butterball.”
“Can you please leave me alone”, Madison tried to persuade the mad doctor, “I’ll ignore this incidence, show you respect, I won’t bother you ever again.”
“Not so haughty now that your secret has been discovered”, Dr. Evans peered savagely at Madison.
“Guess what? Even though you’re slim and trim, you’re still a fat girl, Madison. Fixated at weighing yourself, wondering if it would be okay to have another slice of cheesecake, and compulsively checking out your figure. You put up a confident front but you’re very self-conscious about your figure.”
Madison wiped her eyes, “What can I do to make this go away, I’ll tender my resignation if that’s what you want.”
Dr. Evans smiled, “No, don’t do that, piggy, I mean, Madison. You are a sufficient nurse, not as outstanding as you would like people to believe or you what your ego has convinced yourself. You see, Nurse Warner, all the high minded graduated with honors crap is another valadation of your fragile identity. You see, honey, if you were the intellect, the brainy, superior IQ female, you’d have no reason to tout the point. However, realizing that being a fat girl, you need to propose another cause to salvage what little self-esteem you have. Matter of fact, I can arrange an IQ exam immediately but we both know how you’d score. Right?”
“Dr. Evans, you’re wrong…”, Madison nervously blathered, “…I’m very smart…I could be a psychologist if I resumed my college studies.”
Dr. Evans callously balked at the idea, “That’s a joke, Maddie, your college degrees I question; you’re at a very average IQ range, probably at the lowest mark of average.”
Madison sighed, she knew contesting Dr. Evan’s assessment might not boon very well for her, thus she agreed, “Okay, Doctor, you made your point. I’ll watch my arrogance.”
“Your arrogance is a mask to conceal your inferiority but have it your own way”, Dr. Evans concluded, “Be more civil to me and Leah, and your colleagues, and maybe we’ll get along.”
Madison nodded and quickly hightailed it out of the work out center.
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