by Matt L. » Thu Jan 24, 2019 12:57 pm
Sheila nestled squarely over her bed in an upright position against the wall, gazing outward through the window at the rows of tenant apartments and homes. The hard rain not obscuring her view of the poor neighborhood which was her home or the forecast of her impending fate.
The working class poor, despite seemingly happy their wages were squat, the folks making ends meet the best they could, humble lives day in and day out without any chance for improvement.
Sheila was well aware how much she had changed, current events progressing her further into poverty and the Mexican culture. Being a single mom, and illegal alien on top of it, brought to her mind the stereotype she once dismissed and despised. Filthy and foul leeches, working the system, living on the government’s dime. “They don’t belong here, they should go back to Mexico!”, Sheila more than once made her feelings known to her staff when she was assistant district attorney, adding insult to injury, she occasionally would call them ’chickens’ due to the speed in which they spoke their lingo.
If there was one bright spot it was her friendship with Elena, Rosa and their family.
Modest women who cooked and cleaned and looked after their husbands and their kids without complaint. Habitually domestic, buying clothes at discount shops and flea markets, and wearing whatever garments were comfortable, unconcerned about their weight.
Sheila realized her future; she would be just like the Gonzales sisters in every shape and form, another anonymous citizen of the Spanish slum.
Sheila sighed and rubbed her nose before picking up her cell phone.
“Hello”, Jose answered.
Sheila forced a bubbly tone to her voice, “Hey big man! I was hoping to see you soon, is tomorrow evening okay?”
Jose laughed, “The little make believe wife calls! You don’t need permission, stop by whenever you like!”
Sheila giggled, “Little? Aye crumba! You forget what I look like?”
“I remember you’re cute and look like a real woman”, Jose replied.
“Okay, nice code for saying I’m pudgy…..but I’ll be over around dinner time!” Sheila peeped.
Jose coolly stated, “I’m looking forward to it.”
The conversation soon came to a close, and Sheila eased out of bed to join Elena and family for dinner.
_________
Elena and Rosa persuaded Sheila to dress as poor looking as possible for her visit to the free clinic.
“Looking destitute will work better for you; they’ll give you all types of free stuff!” Rosa conveyed as she handed Sheila a large housedress that had hung in her closet for perhaps a decade.
Sheila agreed, the sisters were far more experienced in this venture than she ever hoped to be.
However, Sheila was nervous about her illegal status but Elena calmed her with an obvious fact, “These people are called social justice warriors, helping you with no questions asked, it’s their life’s work helping the needy.”
Sheila feeling tremendously relieved hugged Elena, “If not for you two, I’d be lost.”
“Hey, family looks after family, you’re our sister!” Rosa called out from the other side of the room.
The virtually ancient garment Sheila wore was a little big but bestowed the impression she was penniless. The colors were washed out and had a real hand-me-down look, matronly in style; Sheila resembled an authentic misplaced woman from a third world country.
On the ride into the vicinity of downtown Los Angeles the females snacked on pop tarts and candy bars, Elena and Rosa both encouraging Sheila to relax and that everything would be okay.
“They will probably give you a Link Card, this card will help with discounts at certain shops but because you’re a foreigner I’m going to have to register for the card”, Elena smiled, “Don’t worry, whenever you need to use it, I’ll be with you.”
“By the way, you don’t speak English and if they ask where’s the dad, say he ditched you and went back to Mexico!” Rosa cheerfully advised Sheila.
Sheila bobbled her head sideways, agreeing despite feeling somewhat guilty about using the system for her own benefit.
“Ah, I will….” Sheila firmly replied, deliberately ignoring her memories of condemning illegal aliens as parasites.
______
The free clinic was cleaner and much more orderly than Sheila imagined, impoverished females from every race standing in line to register or sitting in the waiting room.
The sisters helped Sheila with the various documents she needed to fill out including one to receive public aid. Soon a pretty young Hispanic nurse escorted Sheila to the examination room. Especially cordially, she politely handed Sheila a hospital gown and conducted a general examination before the doctor would give her a much more comprehensive physical.
“Your blood pressure is fine, Sasha, let’s check your weight. Please stand on the scale.”
Sheila held her belly tightly as she stepped aboard the hospital variety scale.
The nurse ran the tiny bar back and forth, adjusting it before determining Sheila’s weight at 241-pounds!
Sheila’s head jolted back and forth, “How much?”
“241-pounds”, the nurse affirmed.
This was the heaviest Sheila had ever weighed, the shock and embarrassment amplified as the nurse inquired, “Have you always been on the heavy side?”
Sheila looked down at her protruding belly, “No, I used to be a thin girl until about a year ago….”
The nurse nodded, scribbling a note in Sheila’s chart.
“…..I used to be self-conscious about getting big”, Sheila awkwardly admitted, “…..but not so much now, us Mexicans gain weight quickly if we’re not careful.”
The nurse asked Sheila a few questions pertaining to her family history and their health, all negative, obesity never entered the picture concerning the Marcus family.
“Okay, Sasha, the doctor will be in to see you shortly”, the nurse smiled.
The doctor was a young man, most likely fresh from medical school, very professional and with a sweet disposition, Sheila quickly becoming enamored with him, blushing several times at his remarks.
“I’m going to arrange an ultra sound for you, okay? The receptionist will have the papers for you to bring to Los Angeles General Hospital, you get it done there.”
The doctor rubbed his eyes, sighing aloud before addressing Sheila in a congenial tone, “You’re a bit heavy but you’re three months into your pregnancy so gaining weight at this point isn’t abnormal. But I want you to eat healthier and exercise.”
Shelia shook her head, “Okay, thank you.”
“How much weight have you put on recently?”
Sheila peeped a nervous giggle, “Recently? Oh, over the last year I guess a little more than a hundred pounds.”
The doctor gently placed his hand over the curvature of Sheila’s belly, “Some of this here is baby fat but you’ve put on astronomical amount. Based on statistics heavier moms are more at risk of gaining an excessive amount of weight. There’s going to be changes in your metabolism and hormones, since you’re already overweight you really need to have less candy and treats and more fruits and vegetables.”
Better said than done but Sheila agreed anyway.
The doctor then reminded Sheila about getting the ultra-sound and to see him again in two weeks.
If anything Sheila was relieved that she was three months into the pregnancy, this ruled out her drunken one night stand and Michael as the baby’s father, Jose was indeed the responsible party.
_____
Before returning to the Spanish slums the females decided to spend some time enjoying the splendor of the Los Angeles metropolitan area. This was a big deal for Elena and Rosa who lived their quiet - unassuming lives in poverty. This was once Sheila’s arena for work and play, but the shine had faded and with that any excitement.
The streets bustling with business people, glamorous beauties, and cars that didn’t have scratches.
The shops were extravagant, the shoppers well-heeled and mostly Caucasian.
The trio took roost at an upscale Ice cream shop, enjoying their banana splits out on the concourse.
Ordering in pigeon English, Sheila had never felt this much a foreigner. The waitress was a mature woman, borderline polite but Sheila felt hostile vibes from staff and patrons alike, she was an outsider, a Mexican who didn’t belong on their turf.
The banter was cheerful, mainly chattering away about Sheila’s pregnancy, although Sheila felt uncomfortable. This was no longer Sheila’s culture, and she conceded to the fact, there was no place for her among the whites. Having a baby definitely amplified Sheila’s reasoning, the child would never know his mother as an ambitious lawyer or even Caucasian. This made it all the more necessary to find some solace in the Mexican culture.
_____
From there they boarded the bus back to their neighborhood and made a trek over to see Julie Chico, the midwife.
Julie had delivered Elena and Rosa’s babies as well as several dozen others in the neighborhood.
A pretty 40-something year old woman, slender with exception to a minor potbelly. Julie lived with her dad and younger brother in one of better maintained homes in the slum.
“I’m a registered nurse, Sasha, so you needn’t worry.”
From there Julie explained that she would deliver the baby at Elena’s home and that she should see her at least twice a month up to the due date.
Sheila inquired about the fee, Julie informed her, “Nothing. It’s my calling to help out the needy; all I ask is that you show some charity to someone else somewhere down the line.”
Just like the doctor, Julie brought up Sheila’s weight but in a conflicting manner.
“Take advantage of your pregnancy and eat hearty, don’t be concerned about watching your figure, you can deal with any weight you put on later, so have all the pies, ice cream and second helpings you like.”
Sheila strummed her belly, “I think so, senorita Chico, I gave up on ever being skinny again.”
____
Upon returning to Elena’s home, Sheila had a snack and then took a nap before going to see Jose and tell him the news.
Elena took it upon herself to bribe the neighbor’s boy with Mexican pastries and a five dollar bill to drive Sheila over to Jose.
Sheila had changed her garb into a fashionable but second hand black blouse - and powder blue with orange stripes stretch slacks. She combed out her locks, letting her mane fall over her shoulders, and went a little over the top with the cosmetics.
Andre, the neighbor’s boy, was duly impressed, returning the five spot back to Elena.
19-years old, Andre worked at the market, fairly good looking and thin, his attire nothing especially remarkable, a T-shirt and jeans.
“So who’s this guy I’m taking you to see?” Andre inquired, “Is he your boyfriend?”
Sheila could tell Andra had taken a shine to her despite the well-fed nature of her face and her belly pouring onto her chunky thighs.
Sheila felt the itch to flirt, how many young guys found her attractive now at her current size? However, her level head prevailed, and she candidly explained, “We have sort of an open relationship but I guess you can say he’s my boyfriend.”
Andre nodded in a frivolous manner, “Okay, Sasha. But what kind of guy doesn’t pick up his woman? He can’t think you’re that special!”
Sheila flipped back her hair, steering her eyes into Andre’s face, “It’s not that easy. Jose has many responsibilities in his neighborhood; it works better if I go to him.”
“Say what you want”, Andre blurted, “It just isn’t right.”
Sheila mischievously grinned, “How do you treat your girlfriends?”
“The girls I see aren’t as beautiful as you, you’re not a girl, you’re a woman!”
Andre had made his statement with such conviction, Sheila was indeed flattered.
“Lots of guys your age wouldn’t consider me so beautiful”, Sheila fluttered her eyes.
Andre acknowledged Sheila with a wide smile, “Real men know beauty isn’t all about looks but attitude and style.”
“You’re smart for being 19!” Shelia giggled.
The conversation, along with the flirting continued on route to Jose’s flat.
Sheila did feel physically attracted to Andre but more so his spunk and daring behavior. In some ways he was like a junior version of Marco, very cool and sure of himself but sans the gang affiliation, cash and crudeness.
Andre pulled his car along side the curb in front of Jose’s apartment.
“You give me a call, I’ll come get you”, Andre firmly told Sheila.
“Oh, well I’m probably spending the night…” Sheila said with a trace of awkwardness.
“That guy doesn’t deserve you”, Andre stated.
Sheila wagged her head, her lips curving into a funky grin, “Wait a few months, honey. You might not want me then?”
Andre lit a cigarette, “If you sense I like you, you must like me too.”
Sheila popped opened the car door, “Yeah, I admire how you speak your mind, that takes balls.”
“And so, mamacita, when can I see you?”
Sheila’s eyes sparkled, “What about your chicas? You really prefer me over them?”
Andre nodded, “No contest, they’re just girls, you’re a woman.”
Sheila couldn’t believe Andre’s determination, and he did make her feel attractive. That meant something, he deserved a reward.
Sheila rolled her eyes in thought, finally replying, “You know I’m living with Elena, so drop by whenever you like. Maybe Wednesday?”
“Wednesday, I’ll be over after work”, Andre confidently smiled.
Sheila anxiously whirled her locks around her fingers, “It’s wrong to lead you on, you know so very little about me.”
“I like what I see”, Andre took a long drag from his smoke, “But I think the more I learn about you, the more I’ll like.”
“Thanks for the lift!” Sheila giggled, “I’ll see you around”, she winked.
Sheila grabbed her bags and then shut the car door, waddling toward Jose’s building before Andre could reply.
__
Sheila quietly let herself in, placing the shopping bags that substituted for authentic luggage unto the floor; she began a search for her Latin lover, the man responsible for the bun in her oven.
Obviously the commotion coming from the bathroom steered Sheila into that direction, holding her head against the door, a broad smile took to her lips and she chuckled at the sound of Jose singing while showering.
Moving in quicker than she believed she could, Sheila pushed away the shower curtain, interrupting Jose’s mangled version of ‘This land is your land, this land is my land’ in Spanish and terribly off key.
“People are going to think I’m torturing you!” Sheila exclaimed with laughter.
“Aw, chica, you have no taste for fine singing!” Jose laughed back.
Sheila crinkled her nose, playfully criticizing his voice, “That’s singing? I was wondering what that was!”
Jose shut off the shower, wiping his face with a grin, “Well, I’m a much better lover than singer…”
Sheila firmly nodded, gazing over his pudgy big belly, “Good thing too because if you made sex like you sing I wouldn’t be over so much!”
Sheila swatted Jose’s belly hard enough that the sound echoed throughout the bathroom, the subsequent quivering motivated her to embrace his gut, the fingertips disappearing into the doughy fat.
Jose responded with a chuckle and awarding Sheila a quick smooch, “Ay, hand me a towel, please.”
Sheila took a step back, “I don’t think so, big man! You look so cute naked.”
Jose took a proud stance, his intentions humorous, “Well of course I do. Now the towel or…..”
Sheila interrupted Jose with a giggle, “Or what?”
“I don’t know but you wouldn’t like it”, Jose chuckled.
Sheila grabbed the towel, a plunder from a stay at the Los Angeles Hilton from years ago, “What’s the big deal, you get to see me naked all the time…”
Jose reached for the towel, Sheila swiftly pulling it away.
“Want to make a deal?” Sheila said, holding the towel behind her back.
“What is it?” Jose replied.
“I want to be pampered this night, so cook me some eggs and bacon and later give me a massage. Agree and you can have your towel.”
Jose whirled his face around in slow motion, “You’re a naughty tease, you needn’t have to bargain for that!”
Sheila walked over to Jose, handing him the towel, “Some tough hombre you are, I thought macho men never gave in to defensive little women.”
Jose began drying himself off, “I could have taken the towel away from you if I really wanted to”, he embarrassingly grinned.
“Hurry up! Get to work!” Sheila laughed, “You shouldn’t have your woman wait!”
Jose set the towel onto the tall metal radiator, and quickly seized Sheila’s big puffy arms, “Watch it! I’d hate to toss you out on the street!” Jose chuckled, subsequently kissing her.
“Oh I’m not kidding, I’m plenty mad”, Sheila snapped, her anger obviously a ruse, “I’m hungry and want to be feed!”
“You’re always hungry…” Jose replied between smooches, “….what’s the big deal?”
“Enough talking, you cook, we talk later!” Sheila betraying her playful mood by way of a silly smile.
“Let me put on some sweats and I’ll get you so well-fed you’ll look like a Gonzales sister!”
Sheila slithered her hand over her belly, “Ay crumba! Those words are truer than you think!”
__
Jose slipped on sweatpants and a T-shirt then went about making Sheila bacon and eggs with fried potatoes and beans. Sheila preferring coffee instead of a beer, Jose didn’t think much of it and favored his darling with the request.
The plate of food Jose slide across the table was basically sufficient but she cracked an outrageously wide smile, “I hope there’s enough left for seconds!”
Jose softly warbled as he glanced back at the stove upon taking a seat at the table, “Should be….”
Edging the fork upward to his mouth, Jose flatly remarked, “….Your appetite is getting crazy.”
Sheila spoke while she chewed, “I was told only this afternoon I got to eat more and not to worry about my weight.”
Jose chuckled, “Who told you that?”
“Julie Chico, the midwife!” Sheila announced with a smile, “She’s going to deliver our baby!”
Jose paused from his meal in shock, “You’re…pregnant?”
Sheila nodded, a smile which matched Sheila’s grew upon his face, “You’re pregnant! Damn! Really?”
“It appears so, honey”, Sheila sugary replied as Jose left his chair and gave her a hug and kiss.
“You’re not angry? You’re okay with this?” Jose asked.
Sheila delicately skimmed her fingertips over Jose’s cheek, “I guess not, funny I thought I would be…”
Jose returned his lips to Sheila’s, the moment of affection brief, “Later okay? I’m eating”, Sheila smirked.
Jose patted Sheila on the shoulder, “Sure, mamacita!”
Sheila giggled, wagging her head, “More beans if you please…”
___
The conversation throughout the remainder of the meal mainly concerned Jose inquiring over such things such as how Sheila felt and how many months along. From there they went to the bedroom, Jose favoring Sheila with a massage.
Jose lit some candles and put on some soft romantic music as Sheila undressed, she proudly pushed out her belly, comparing it to her man’s beer barrel gut.
“Well it’s not so big like yours now but give it some time”, Sheila humorously squeaked, “Soon your belly will be nothing to brag about next to mine.”
Jose squarely glimpsed Sheila’s blubbery bulge, a rascal variety grin matching his tone, “Now that’s what I got to see!”
Sheila wiggled her hefty rump as she marched toward the bed, the flabby cocoon condition of her thighs quivering in sync.
Jose was hands on meticulous with the massage once Sheila climbed into bed, beginning with her waist and belly.
Sheila closed her eyes, Jose’s gentle touch causing her to purr.
“Julie, she says for me to take advantage of my pregnancy and eat good”, Sheila uttered, “I never thought I’d say this but there’s no initiate for me to watch my weight. I’m only saying this to warn you because I have a feeling I’m going to get huge.”
Jose applied little pressure over Sheila’s belly, smoothly trailing his fingers around her navel region and the pronounced curvature.
“If you’re worried I won’t be attracted to you….” Jose happily sighed, “….I’m fine with it.”
Sheila uttered a muffled snort as Jose’s fingertips strummed her upper thighs before handling them more firmly, his big hands looking diminutive in comparison to her chunky legs.
Sheila hummed away, sharing her thoughts aloud, Jose listening attentively.
“I keep thinking about our culture, Elena and Rosa, it’s common for Mexican women to get big, right? It doesn’t bother them and their men don’t mind. Its celebrating beauty that white women don’t understand.”
Jose cracked an eye; he understood Sheila was looking for approval.
“Yes my love, in our culture a woman’s size doesn’t harm her beauty, instead it shows she is confident and strong and sexy.”
From there Jose wrangled Sheila’s plump calves, kneading the spongy coating of fat.
Sheila continued, “Ay, as you put it makes very much sense. I know what I say won’t make sense but let me tell you.”
“Of course”, Jose replied.
“I want our child raised to be proud of his heritage, our culture; I don’t want the baby involved with other races, especially the whites…”
“I know what you’re saying and I agree”, Jose calmly interrupted Sheila, “But we don’t want our child to be racist do we?”
“I no explain so good, big man”, Sheila’s expression roughly funky, “What I mean is I don’t want baby influenced by different ways of life, let him or her grow up with honor, no having to depend on the crumbs some people think the child might deserve.”
“I get what you’re saying, hot stuff”, Jose smiled, “You want the child independent and something of an example of a good Mexican, not needing any help making it through life.”
Sheila shook her head.
Jose’s fingers traveled up Sheila’s thighs, once again delicately rubbing her buttery insulated belly.
There was a rubbery yet cushy texture to her skin, the dome was thoroughly tremendous, a round gooey swelling of flab.
“I’m with you all the way”, Jose confidently assured his chubby vixen, “Whatever you want or need, you have my support. Maybe it’s time you move in with me finally, I can keep a better eye on you then.”
Sheila grabbed Jose fingers and kissed the tips, her smile razor-sharp like the twinkling of her lovely eyes, “I know all about that, you’re loyal and I love you for that….”
“Why do I feel a but coming along?” Jose inquired.
“I wish you happiness and you have my heart but until you leave the gang and for good, I can’t move in with you, I can’t fully commit myself to you.”
“Ay chica, you talk nonsense, I will leave the gang, it’s just hard for me at this moment but lots of female members are mothers, why you worry?”
“Why I worry?” Sheila sniffled, “You get arrested, I’m out on the streets, maybe even get deported. But worse, what if our baby grows up to be a mindless thug, have no conscience, I don’t want our child to be a criminal.”
“Neither do I”, Jose blurted, “But you think so much”, his voice alarmingly resentful, “You think me a thug? You understand the people I deal with are lowlifes and that the money I make is from the worse losers you can think of?”
“No, damn, Jose”, Sheila tried to soften her point; “I know you have a good heart but this business you’re in stinks. You can get hurt or hurt somebody else. Somewhere at some time, somebody who is innocent becomes a victim, you no see that?”
Jose removed himself off the bed, “This talk is bullshit. You know I’ve always been in a gang; it’s the only life I know. You need to understand this, leaving the gang isn’t easy. I’m not going to be picking up after whites like you do!”
“What do you think of me picking up after whites, you calling me a traitor, a beaner?” Sheila scowled and huffed, rolling unto her side, her face away from Jose.
“I’m getting a beer, I need to be alone”, Jose stated as he walked out of the bedroom.
Sheila began to sniffle; maybe it would be best if she returned to the Gonzales homestead for the night.
Lifting her well-nourished form from the bed, Sheila dressed herself in her bra and panties, uneasily wobbling into the front room where Jose sat in the recliner drinking a beer.
“If you’re trying to turn me on, it won’t work”, Jose said gruffly.
Sheila wiped her nose, gaping at Jose while nervously rubbing her belly.
“I’m sorry for demanding so much of you, I’ll….I’ll try to understand..” Sheila uncomfortably wheezed.
Jose waved Sheila over, fondling her thick roll which poured over the waistband, “I wish to take you away, maybe Hector will buy my half of the bar, we can move to Texas or Nevada, somewhere we can start over.”
“I like that, sweetheart”, Sheila acknowledged Jose with a bouquet of a smile.
Jose grasped the lower section of her belly’s bulbous slope, “But you got to be having patience, really you do. I can’t be a janitor. Maybe I can open a filling station or something like that? Ay, my lovely beauty?”
Sheila trailed her fingers off Jose’s face, “I’d like that. Now come to bed.”
“You still don’t want to move in with me?” Jose asked.
“This is my first pregnancy; don’t you think I should stay as close to the Gonzales sisters so they can advise me?”
Maybe it was out of spite because of Sheila’s adamant refusal to move in with him but a least he said it with a comical expression, “Okay, that makes sense I guess but those women love to show their affection through food, you really are going to get huge.”
Sheila took the pot shot humorously, forcing a giggle but it did hurt a little, “You’re not kidding!”
Sheila moved backward, “Don’t be too upset, honey.”
“Until we’re under the same roof there is no relationship between us, I’ll support the baby, look after you but I’m not you’re man.”
Sheila grabbed hold of her belly, wincing as a tear rolled down her cheek, “Maybe I should leave…”
“No, it’s late, you have my room, I’ll sleep out here.”
Sheila tethered in her spot for a moment before turning around and waddling into the bedroom.
_____________